“The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts.”
Marcus Aurelius
‘Living your best life’ might sound like trite and cliche phrase. What does it really mean, and what does it look like in practice?
Let me preface everything you read below with this caveat: this is what I’ve found to be true during my short time on earth, to the best of my knowledge during the current time of this writing.
Take it with a grain of salt, keep what you find useful, discard what you don’t, or completely ignore it all if you wish. But I think if you take these ideas seriously and try to enact them in your life, even in small ways, I can promise you you’ll start living a more fulfilled life. It’s been true for me and countless others. And ultimately we’re all still students learning on this journey together.
We are all works in progress.
At the heart of human existence lies a single, unshakable truth: we are becoming. Every day, every decision, every habit either pulls us toward our best self or away from it.
But becoming the best version of yourself isn’t just about optimizing habits or career achievements. It starts at the top: your internal world. Your virtues, philosophy, and aim (which I refer to as telos) dictate everything that follows—your energy, work, and relationships. When you align these forces, you unlock a life of purpose, power, and fulfillment.
1. THE INTERNAL WORLD: YOUR GUIDING NORTH STAR
Before you optimize anything external, you must define your internal compass. Who are you? What do you stand for? What virtues guide your decisions? Without a clear philosophy, you will drift.
Telos: Defining Your Life’s Aim
Telos is the Greek word for “end goal” or “ultimate purpose.” Aristotle believed that every human has an innate drive toward eudaimonia—a flourishing life filled with meaning. Without telos, life becomes a series of distractions rather than a purposeful journey.
Your telos can be developed, it can shift and change over time, but in my experience when you find the greatest and simplest aim for your life that rings the most true – it will stick with you forever.
‘To be loved and respected by those closest to me’ for example, is an honorable aim that will likely never change but can always be expanded on.
Questions to Define Your Telos:
- What kind of person do I want to become?
- What values do I want to embody daily?
- What legacy do I want to leave behind?
Virtues: The Bedrock of a Strong Character
Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and Epictetus all agreed: virtue is the key to freedom. When you cultivate discipline, courage, wisdom, and integrity, you create a bedrock and foundation for your entire life.
In day-to-day life there is often a disconnect when it comes putting these virtues into practice. They are abstract, philosophical – not concrete and applicable. Which is why Wisdom Well was created, to take abstract theory and principles and help you put them into practice, every day.
Core Virtues to Develop In Everyday Life:
- Discipline (Self-mastery and control)
- Courage (Acting in alignment with your values despite fear)
- Wisdom (Seeking truth, learning continuously)
- Integrity (Being honest and living authentically)
You’ll face resistance from what we you might call ‘your lower self’ as you try to cultivate these virtues. Every day is a battle, every moment matters, and every action you take is consequential. Sound like a lot of responsibility? It is! Now bear it. You are strong enough.
Steven Pressfield calls this the battle against Resistance in The War of Art: “Resistance will tell you anything to keep you from doing your work. It will perjure, fabricate; it will seduce, bully, and lie. Resistance will assume any form, if that’s what it takes to stop you. It will reason with you like a lawyer or jam a nine-millimeter in your face like a stickup man. Resistance will pledge anything to get a deal, then double-cross you as soon as your back is turned. If you take Resistance at its word, you deserve everything you get. Resistance will not be reasoned with. It is always lying and always full of shit.”
Your job? Master your virtues and fight Resistance daily.
2. ENERGY: MASTERING YOUR PHYSICAL VEHICLE
Your body is your instrument for action. A weak, exhausted body produces weak, exhausted thoughts and actions. To master your internal world, you must also take care of the physical vehicle that moves you through the world. Your mind and body are not separate – they are one in the same, and together make up the container for your spirit, soul, (insert concept of choice here).
James Clear reminds us in Atomic Habits: “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.” Your energy levels, fitness, and health are direct reflections of your self-respect and discipline.
Key Areas of Energy Mastery:
- Sleep: The foundation of cognitive function, willpower, and mood. Jordan Peterson: “Fix your damn sleep schedule.”
- Training: Whether lifting weights, running, or practicing martial arts, physical mastery breeds mental resilience. David Goggins pushes this further: “The only way to grow is to force yourself into discomfort.”
- Nutrition: What you eat fuels your mind. Ryan Holiday: “Discipline, by its very nature, requires us to act in defiance of our appetites.”
- Digital Discipline: Avoid excessive social media, which drains mental energy. Cal Newport: “Focus is the new IQ in the knowledge economy.”
Energy Practices to Live By:
- Get sunlight first thing in the morning (regulates sleep and mood).
- Train hard at least 3-5x a week.
- Eat real food—more protein, fewer processed carbs.
- Minimize distractions—turn off notifications.
- Meditate or sit in silence daily.
Your day might look nothing like this right now. That’s fine! You can literally start optimizing your energy just 1 minute at a time. Start small, aim small, miss small.
3. WORK: MEANINGFUL CONTRIBUTION
Your work should align with your telos. Your best self isn’t chasing money for money’s sake—it’s creating, building, and contributing in a way that fulfills you.
1. Master Your Craft (Whatever It Is)
“Be so good they can’t ignore you.” – Steve Martin
Cal Newport in So Good They Can’t Ignore You explains: “Passion follows mastery—not the other way around.” The more skilled you become, the more you love what you do.
Work with Purpose:
- Seek mastery, not mediocrity.
- Eliminate distractions and deep dive into your craft.
- Play long-term games with long-term people (Naval Ravikant).
- Challenge yourself daily.
The Productivity Equation:
Meaningful Work = (Time × Intensity) – Distraction
4. LOVE: MASTERING RELATIONSHIPS
At the end of life, what truly matters is who you loved and who loved you back.
1. Self-Respect Comes First
If you don’t respect yourself, you will tolerate toxic relationships.
Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga, in The Courage to Be Disliked, argue: happiness comes from choosing self-respect over seeking approval.
2. Romantic Love: The Right Partner is Everything
Your choice of partner is the biggest decision you’ll ever make. Seek someone who:
- Shares your values.
- Pushes you to be better.
- Excites and calms you.
And remember: being a great partner matters more than finding one.
3. Brotherhood & Sisterhood: The Power of Deep Friendships
Seneca: “Associate with those who will make a better man of you.”
Tim Ferriss: “You are the average of the five people you associate with most.”
Relationship Practices:
- Respect yourself first.
- Choose quality over quantity in relationships.
- Show up fully—don’t half-ass connections.
- Love deeply, even when it’s inconvenient.
Closing: The Best Version of Yourself is Created Daily
There is no final form of you—only continuous evolution. Every choice either aligns with your best self or pulls you further from it.
Maslow warned: “If you plan on being anything less than you are capable of being, then I warn you: you will be deeply unhappy for the rest of your life.”
The choice is ours.
Share this with someone who needs it. The world needs more people living at their highest potential.
